Words by Denny Nesbitt // photograph by Daria Trofimova
Midlife brings a natural desire to reassess values, priorities and who you want to be in the next chapter of your life. In my work with women in their 40s and 50s, I’ve noticed a common theme which is that many women aren’t looking for more at work – more money, more status, more responsibility. What they’re looking for is meaning. In the stories women shared with me while I was writing my book about midlife career change, the shift was clear: success mattered less than whether work actually fits. The question wasn’t what’s next? But what matters to me now?
One woman I spoke to had spent years as a senior management consultant within a well-known firm, when a move overseas for her husband’s job prompted her to reconsider what she wanted from her own career: she found herself at a crossroads: continue down the same path in a new country or explore something new? After some reflection, experimentation and chance encounters she moved into a business lecturing role at a university, drawing directly on the expertise she’d built in consulting. What surprised her wasn’t how different the work was, but how different it felt. She talked about the satisfaction of working alongside academic colleagues, supporting students as they developed practical capability and having the flexibility to live her life in a way consulting never allowed. The work wasn’t louder or more prestigious – but it felt meaningful.
Why “more meaning” doesn’t mean a total career overhaul
What often starts as a niggle that something is off at work can quickly turn into alarm and panic. Women often find themselves caught between the fantasy of meaningful work and the utter fear of a total career overhaul: retraining, starting again or walking away from work they’ve spent decades building. It’s an unsettling thought, particularly in midlife when the stakes can feel higher.
There’s also a common assumption that meaningful work must look a certain way – like thinking it needs to be in a charity or not-for-profit – which may not align with financial needs, flexibility or lifestyle. Others feel an intense pressure to get the “next chapter” of their life exactly right, as though midlife demands a perfect final answer to the question of work. Understandably, that combination can feel like a pressure cooker.
In reality, meaning rarely arrives through dramatic reinvention. More often, it emerges through smaller shifts – change in focus, contribution or context that allow work to better reflect who you are now. Releasing the idea that meaning requires a complete overhaul can be the first and most relieving step forward.
The next question becomes how to make the shift.
Start by revisiting your values – not your job title
What motivated you in your twenties, is unlikely to be what motivates you now. Early in our careers, many of us are driven by external markers – pay, progression and recognition. With time and experience, those drivers often lose their pull. It’s worth pausing to consider what matters to you now.
- When do I feel most useful, not just busy?
- What drains me faster than it used to?
- What do I want to be known for now?
Look for meaning where you already are
Before you abandon your current role, give some thought to how you could infuse in it with more meaning. Very often meaning comes from how the work is done, not what the work is. For example, if mentoring others is important to you, are there opportunities to do more of that? If creativity feels important, where might you make space for it? Are there tasks you could step back from – by delegating or training others – so you can focus on work that feels more purposeful?
There may also be opportunities to contribute beyond your formal role. During a difficult period in my own role, leading a women’s equity group allowed me to focus on something that strongly aligned with my values. It gave me a sense of purpose at a time when I might otherwise have disengaged – and connected me with others who cared about similar issues.
Follow your curiosity, not a master plan
Many women tie themselves in knots trying to achieve clarity over what comes next. In practice, clarity about meaningful work rarely comes from thinking harder. It tends to emerge through action, experimentation and learning.
Conversations, short courses, volunteering or small projects, can all offer insight without requiring a long-term commitment. Earlier in life we were often told we needed a plan; with age comes the understanding that plans evolve – and curiosity can be a far more useful guide.
This is where confidence enters the conversation. Women in midlife frequently describe confidence as the barrier to change, particularly if they’ve been in the same field or organisation for a long time. It can feel difficult to step out of familiar patterns or redefine how you contribute. While it’s tempting to wait till you feel clear and ready, confidence usually follows action rather than preceding it.
Wanting more meaning at work isn’t a sign that something has gone wrong. It’s a sign that, even in midlife, you are still growing and shifting. With experience comes clarity about what no longer fits – it’s natural that you should want work to better reflect your values, your life and your sense of contribution.
Meaning doesn’t arrive all at once and it doesn’t require a perfect plan. It’s shaped through attention, reflection and small, intentional choices over time. By releasing the pressure to get the next chapter “right,” many women find space to notice what already matters – and to build work that feels more aligned, sustainable and their own.
