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Writing by Haylee Penfold // photograph by Anastasia Taioglou

the sound of waves used to make me feel like home

and you made me hate the beach

the noise that once comforted me

Had suddenly become the soundtrack of my worst nightmare.

 

He took me to see the ocean yesterday and

For the first time

I didn’t think about you

or the way you held me down.

 

I remember lying in the sand

you made me feel like

Every grain was slowly breaking me

Turning me into shattered glass

 

Today he kisses me on the shore

And the water cleansed me

Of any trace of you.

 

Because you may have turned me

Into shattered glass,

But I turned those into something else,

Something stronger.

 

Now I am a mosaic,

A piece of art to be admired,

Not just to look at but to listen to.

 

Because although I am made of fragments

I am not broken,

I never was.

Haylee Penfold

Haylee Penfold, she/her, is a twenty something, chronic illness advocate who is passionate about all things sex education and pleasure positivity. Will also bring up Harry Styles in any context she can.

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